Posh proud of Beck’s package

Just as Samantha was smitten with Smith’s giant underwear ad on Sex and the City, Victoria Beckham’s proud of her man’s large package. "I'm proud to see his penis 25 foot tall. It's great," the Posh tart told the UK’s Sun about David Beckham’s bulging bratwurst. "It's huge. It's enormous. Massive." The Spice Girl added, "If I looked like that I'd walk down the street in my panties too." However, that’s not a far stretch considering some of the skimpy outfits she flits around in look like lingerie.

WAG reality?

Eva Longoria recently shelled out advice to Jessica Simpson via the media on how to handle dating a sports star. Considering the number of celebs who are dating or married to athletes, InsideEonline.com’s Emer Schlosser suggested someone throw all the WAG’s in a house and call it reality television. You got Eva Longoria (who’s married to basketball star Tony Parker), Jessica Simpson (who’s dating footballer Tony Romo), Victoria Beckham (married to the sexiest of them all, soccer star David Beckham), and then whichever blonde’s dating Sean Avery that week. It would be a full house that could possibly rival The Surreal World.

Mr Blackwell's wicked worst-dressed list

It’s that time of the year again, bitchy Mr Blackwell releases his worst-dressed list and knocks the egos of some wannabe fashionista celebs down a couple pegs. Coming in at number one was Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham (who recently discussed her dreams of being a stylist, ouch). "Forget the fashion spice — wearing a skirt would suffice!,” Blackwell said. “In one skinny-mini monstrosity after another, pouty posh can really wreck-em." Into second place - by a beehive - was Amy Winehouse (who, on a sorta related topic, recently just dyed her hair platinum blonde) of whom Blackwell wrote: "Exploding beehives above… tacky polka-dots below... she's part ‘50s car-hop horror." Of third place’s Mary-Kate Olsen, he simply said: "YIKES!,” adding, “In layers of cut-rate kitsch, Mary-Kate's look is hard to explain... she resembles a tattered toothpick trapped in a hurricane!" Fourth place’s Fergie had her fashion described as "Another style-free 'Fergie' in fashion's hall of shame? Yes, when it comes to couture chaos, guess it's all in a name!" (love the rhymes!) She may be an American Idol, but a fashion idol Kelly Clarkson is not since she took a fifth place position. "Her heavenly voice soars above the rest... but those belly-baring bombs are hellish at best! She may be the queen of 'ProActive' — but that wardrobe looks downright radioactive!" In sixth was Bond babe Eva Green who was apparently "Stuck in neon nightmares not fit for the sane. Fashion this loud could give Bond a migraine! A profusion of confusion from toes to nose!" Canuck Avril Lavigne landed in seventh and earned the comment: "Gothic makeup courtesy of the mad spatula — Fashions provided by... The house of Dracula!" Next came Jessica Simpson who was warned to: "Forget the Cowboys. In prom queen screams, can it get any worse? She's a global fashion curse!" The penultimate position went to Lindsay Lohan: "Lindsay the fashion frenzy strikes again! Lohan takes fashion to a new low." And last but not least, Alison Arngrim: "Little Nellie of the prairie, looks like a 1940's fashion editor for the Farmer’s Almanac." However, o be fair to Arngrim, she did grow up playing Nellie on Little House on the Prairie, the fashion (or lack there of) was bound to rub off on her. But the piece of news that’s getting as much if not more coverage than people who actually landed on the list, is that Britney was spared. “For those of you who were expecting to see Britney's name adorn the 2007 list, I felt that it was inappropriate at this time to make comment, when her personal life is in such upheaval,” Blackwell said. “I hope 2008 is a better year for her.”

Puh-leeze Posh

Victoria Beckham tried to claim she’s not a media whore who craves the spotlight like a fat kid does Smarties. "[My family spends] a lot of time socializing at home so we don't get photographed… I couldn't live a life where I was under the spotlight everyday," Posh told Extra. "If you look at someone like Britney Spears, I couldn't do that. I've got to have my privacy at home with my husband and my children otherwise,I'd end up going loopy." Of course if one had a hubby like David Beckham they should want to stay home (and in bed), but it seems like there’s a Beckham, like, all the time (plus their appearances in rag mags seem to be on par, if not more frequent than the Toxic singer). And if anyone saw her show, Victoria Beckham: Coming to America (which, by the way, was awesome!), they would have seen someone who seems to love hamming it up for the camera.

Beckham, is that a soccer ball in your pocket or are you just happy to see me…

Nobody bares it like Beckham! Like an early holiday gift, David Beckham’s down to his briefs for Giorgio Armani’s tantalizing new underwear ad campaign (and you couldn’t find a better specimen to model them!). Armani apparently designed the drawers with David in mind. “I design with the body of a classical athlete in my head,” the fashion designer told the UK’s Times. “David recalls the classical ideal – he brings to mind the beautiful Michelangelo statue in Florence... For me, David represents a notion of modern masculinity: strong, fit, healthy, but also sensitive and considerate.” And how does David feel about his nearly naked body being splashed on billboards and buses around the world? “I’ve not done many pictures that reveal quite so much,” he said. “But I think the pictures will speak for themselves.” Speak? Honey, they shout! In fact, the big bulge he packs has been under attack by haters questioning the PhotoShopping of the pic. Who better than his wife and mother of his children, Victoria “Posh Spice” Beckham, to set the record straight? "I'm proud I still have a really good sex life with David. He is very much in proportion,” she was quoted as saying by Bang. “He does have a huge one, though. He does. You can see it in the advert. It is all his. It is like a tractor exhaust pipe!"

Beckhams booze it up

The Beckhams are boogying down likes it’s 199somethin’. Both David and Victoria Beckham have supposedly been boozing like before they had babies, and loving every minute of it. “We are having the time of our lives,” Posh told the UK’s Sun. “It hasn’t been like this for years — since before our first son, Brooklyn, was born. We’ve had two nights out on the trot, which have been really messy, and we are loving it. We have been lying in every day watching films as we haven’t got the kids. We are behaving like rock stars — late-night drinking on tour.” Bravo Beckhams! Cheers!

Beckham snoozes sans clothes

Victoria Beckham recently revealed something that’s sure to get hearts racing: "I sleep naked,” Posh told Elle magazine. “I'm going to be naked if I'm getting in bed with [my husband, David Beckham] every night." No kidding, I don’t think I’d ever want clothes on around him (same goes for him too). But that’s not all she’s confessing, she also admitted that she’s a jack-of-all-trades, and, according to her, she’s master of none. "It became very obvious from the start [of my career] that I was never going to be the best singer or the best dancer or the best actress," she said. "I was never a 'natural.' You know, I've never been that good at anything, to be completely honest… I'm no Mariah Carey, but I can sing." If she says so. And here’s what else she says: "I'm so camp!” (duh, darling). “I'm such a gay man trying to get out. I don't give a [bleep] what anybody thinks!"